when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
