So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize