Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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