STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
