I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Are my feet made of real feet?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
