Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
