idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
