Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
