i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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