You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
