Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
