So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
