...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
