I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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