Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
