Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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