Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I can text with my tongue
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She even gives head with a lisp.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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