Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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