I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
