possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
