I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize