Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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