Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
