...so i touched it.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize