i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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