I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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