...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
