So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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