I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize