Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
it glows. i had to have it.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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