your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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