she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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