I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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