this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize