Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize