My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
