My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
