weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
