just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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