I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize