The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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