Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
