...so i touched it.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
