that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
