Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I'm both gender and math confused
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
