you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Randomize
