so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
