Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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