So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize