Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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