I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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