Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
